Dialogue can make a difference. Pixelfit/E+/Getty Images
Americans largely agree that women have made significant gains in the workplace over the past two decades. But what about men? While many Americans believe women are thriving, over half believe men’s progress has stalled or even reversed.
To make matters more complex, recent research has revealed a massive divide along gender and partisan lines. The majority of Republican men think full gender equity in America has been achieved, while the majority of Democratic women think there’s still work to be done.
As researchers at the Rutgers Center for Women in Business, we think this divide matters a lot. And for business leaders, this gap isn’t just a social or political issue. It’s a leadership challenge with direct implications for team cohesion and morale. If gender equity efforts are seen by some employees as a loss rather than a collective gain, leaders risk inadvertently entrenching division.
When equity feels like a loss
Efforts to advance gender equity often come with the reassurance that equality isn’t a zero-sum game – that women’s advancement need not come at men’s expense. Data backs this up, showing, for example, that having gender-diverse executive teams can boost company profits by as much as 21%.
Yet workers’ perceptions of gender equity efforts tell another story.
For example, 61% of Americans believe changing gender norms have made it easier for women to be successful at work, but only 36% say the same for men. What’s more, 61% of men think women have equal job opportunities, but only 33% of women believe the same thing.
These differences reveal an important truth: Perception, not policy alone, shapes how equity efforts are received.
Involving men in the equity conversation
Research suggests men and women associate power with different psychological outcomes. Men are more likely to associate power with control, while for women, power is more often linked to a feeling of freedom. As a result, efforts to share power may feel more liberating to women but destabilizing to men – particularly to those already in power.
But this doesn’t mean one’s gain needs to come at another’s expense – just that people make sense of change through the lens of their own identities and experiences.
When men perceive progress for women as a threat to their status or opportunity, resistance grows, even in the face of data suggesting otherwise. This cycle becomes especially difficult to break because it requires challenging one’s own beliefs, which isn’t always easy.
This is why learning about others’ experiences is so useful. For example, a man and a woman might be equally ambitious and capable, but perhaps only one of them experiences being routinely interrupted in meetings. These differences in personal history and lived experience shape how work environments are interpreted and therefore navigated.
Understanding this diversity of perspectives and discussing lived experiences can help gender equity efforts become more effective. Building a truly equitable future requires acknowledging that feelings about efforts required to reach that future may differ widely.
With that in mind, here are some best practices for leaders to consider as they navigate the changing landscape.
Preparing for differences in perspective
Avoid zero-sum thinking. If men think gender equity efforts will erode their opportunities or diminish their own power, they’ll disengage. Leaders should instead frame equity as essential to team and business success – and ground conversations in metrics that show how inclusion drives outcomes.
Know that the stakes may vary. Women may see gender equity as a matter of justice or even survival, and when stakes are existential, compromise can be difficult. At the same time, they may experience organizational progress toward gender equity as a personal win. Publicizing these changes and their mutually beneficial gains can help to create a more cohesive team where everyone can thrive.
Be aware that different clocks are ticking. Some men may view change as happening too quickly, destabilizing established norms. Women, on the other hand, may feel progress is too slow, given centuries of systemic inequity. Holding both views as worthy of respect requires teamwork. Encourage dialogue where the goal is mutual understanding rather than unity.
Building coalitions around shared experiences
Promote policies that benefit everyone. By promoting policies such as hybrid work and parental leave that benefit everyone, workplaces will attract and retain a more diverse workforce, which leads to greater innovation. Encourage men to take advantage of these policies and ensure your company culture makes it acceptable to do so. This enables men to actually experience the benefit of these initiatives. Align efforts around shared values – such as the desire for healthier families, better education or stronger economies.
Use both/and thinking. Supporting men who express fears about status loss can open space for dialogue. Provide that space. At the same time, acknowledge the ongoing struggles women continue to face and their fears about workplaces returning to “the way they used to be.” One viewpoint does not need to negate the other.
Prioritize lived experience. Rather than insisting that everyone see gender equity the same way, find ways for men to experience mutually beneficial initiatives. Then, encourage dialogue about experiences rather than ideas.
Bridge divides with dialogue
Mixed mentorship matters. Pairing employees with mentors of different backgrounds – across gender, race, age, department or seniority level – can help them cultivate curiosity and learn from one another.
Activate resource groups. Groups focused on cross-cultural engagement provide employees with a platform to discuss challenges, share experiences and collaborate on inclusion initiatives. Additionally, encouraging allies to participate in employee resource groups and business resource groups fosters increased openness and understanding. Leaders can support groups by providing resources, visibility and executive sponsorship.
Embrace discomfort. In general, people work to avoid feeling uncomfortable. However, discomfort is often necessary for growth. Starting with this premise and encouraging thoughtful, open and honest discussions about sensitive topics and potential fears can help foster transparency and build trust. Leaders can facilitate these conversations through town halls, roundtable discussions or dedicated dialogue sessions.
Progress depends not just on metrics and policies but on trust, communication and humility. When people feel seen and heard – whether they’re feeling empowered or uncertain – they’re more likely to engage.
In other words, the real opportunity isn’t to win an argument about whether gender equity is “done,” but to build organizations where everyone can see a future for themselves in the workplace – and feel as if they have a role in shaping it.
The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.
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Author : Colleen Tolan, Postdoctoral Researcher for the Center for Women in Business, Rutgers University
Publish date : 2025-05-19 12:43:00
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